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Where is the Peace?

If you are a college student or really any person trying to figure out what the heck God has planned for your life let me just say that is a hard, confusing, and annoying place to be. I’m here to say I still have no clue about what I am doing, but here is how I found peace in the meantime. 

 

I just do not understand how an 18-year-old supposed to know what to major in or what job to get. For a long time, I have felt stuck in the mindset that the corporate world is an evil place, medical school takes a horribly long time, teaching is underpaid, but also that you can’t do much with a simple sociology degree. Throughout my freshman year, I ~officially~ changed my major 3 times but ask my roommate, I really changed my major about every other day. I was stressing myself out because I would hear someone say something bad about business majors and think that was God’s way of telling me to not apply to the business school, or I would see a poster for a medical service trip and feel like that was how I was being called to go to the nations. It was exhausting and just super confusing.

 

When it came time to think about summer plans, I knew I wanted to go on a longerish mission trip but I of course couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do. Well that right there was the problem. It wasn’t about what I wanted to do. I wanted to go to Thailand to see pretty beaches, but God wanted me to go to Panama. He knew Panama was where I would finally be able to grasp the concept of grace and be met with overwhelming peace. He knew Panama was where I would find a school with kids that just radiate pure love. He knew Panama was where I would meet 7 other amazing humans who are just as confused as I am but who are pursuing Christ above all else. They literally left their lives at home to serve Him around the world for 11 months! He knew Panama was where I would meet a life-long friend who would act a fool but would push me towards Christ because she knows that is the best thing a friend can do. Panama was exactly what I needed at exactly the right time, and that is just how God works. 

 

When I got home and started sharing stories about Panama I told my parents that it was probably “the best month of my life.” That’s a powerful statement and it sounds pretty dramatic but I think it’s true! Community is such a special thing, and going from no real community to a World Race community kinda rocks your world. There is nothing like the freedom you feel when you are surrounded by people who share the same heart and the same goals. You know they are there to encourage you and they will support you know matter what because you are all bonded by perfect love. I think the best part about experiencing community is that we get to touch a piece of heaven because in heaven we will be in the most perfect, loving, Godly community for eternity! 

 

I think Panama was the best month of my life because I was known and loved for a whole month! Fully known and fully loved. Of course no one can fully know me like Jesus, but there is something so cool that happens when you share your heart with people who want to build you up and show you grace. I don’t think I have ever experienced such a perfect picture of how Jesus knows and loves us. It makes me so happy thinking about the fact that God knows my sin and He loves me despite it. He knows that I desire to serve him with my career and He loves me for it. He is so dang good! 

 

That is when I found my peace – when I realized that I can never do enough to feel satisfied with my own works. I will never be proud of myself or feel like I accomplished enough if I don’t realize that the only person I am trying to make proud is God. My major, my job, my grades – none of those will seem fulfilling if I am trying to satisfy myself. My satisfaction only comes from God! And with that I also realized my ministry goal – I want the whole world to feel the peace and joy I have knowing that I am fully known and loved by God. I want the whole world to know that our works and our accomplishments will never be enough, that we will only be satisfied when we realize that Jesus is our only hope. He is enough! 

 

So, that is my new goal. I have no idea how that translates to a major or job, but that’s all God wants me to know for now and I have peace with that. I hope you can find peace with knowing that God has You where He wants you and as long as You are pursuing Him, you will not be led down the wrong path. 

 

My grace is sufficient for you,

because my power is made perfect in weakness

therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness

so that the power of Christ may rest on me.

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecution, and calamities.

For when I am weak, then I am strong. 

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

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